school

Monday, February 05, 2007

i was in school tonite and i did really good. i spoke up a lot, not because i knew i would be right, but because i wanted to try. the teacher liked the things i was saying and asked if i ate my wheaties this morning. that made me laugh and made me feel good because it means i said good things. i wish i could feel like that all the time.
there was a boy looking at me on the train and after the 3rd or 4th time i wondered if there was something on my face, or if there was something weird about how i looked. i got kind of nervous about it. i was wearing glasses and a hat and had no makeup on and i didn't think he was looking at me because he liked me or anything. i wish. he was a cute boy. but he didn't smile or anything. cute boys don't usually smile at me like they like me and i get tired of waiting for that. sometimes i just wanna say: "hey, what about me?". but i only think that in my mind. i would be too scared to really say it. what if they laugh at me? or ignore me? or look at me like i'm crazy? i really wouldn't know what to do, so i guess i'll just stay quiet. it's not as scary.