lonely

Sunday, March 04, 2007

i feel kinda lonely. it's sunday afternoon and my phone hasn't rung once since friday afternoon. isn't that weird? well, for me, it feels weird. i mean, i don't really have time to do much w/any friends because i have a lot of school work...but i wonder why no one has at least called. i wonder if i did something to push people away and what it was. things feel hard enough w/boys and school, i don't want to have to try so hard w/ my friends. don't people miss me when i don't call? sometimes i wonder if i'm the only one that feels like i don't have a social life. i mean, i wonder what all my friends are doing and it's usually something w/their bf or husband or even roommate. it's weird that i don't have a built in buddy and i get scared when i start to and then it goes away. i start to wonder if i was a good friend in the first place. maybe i'm easy to lose or forget about. i don't think i am and i get scared if i start to think about myself that way. i know i need to just think about schoolwork but it's hard when you feel sad.